The key to any long-term relationship is communication. It’s foundation stone of relationship. Without of it, Relationship become shallow and meaningless. However, the art of communication is difficult and this is because, in order to communicate properly with someone else, it must have restored the balance within it. For example, it is natural that if you relinquish constantly or do not talk regularly with your partner, it will come a moment to explode. Here are some phrase that you can avoid in your relationship :
1. “I hate it when you do that”
You can irritate yourself indefinitely when it leaves the hair from shaving to the sink or when your wife talks with the hours on the phone but try to restrain when you are going to tell them what is what bothers you. “Couples should watch the words they use, and the word” I hate “, can be somewhat intense. On the contrary, you can say that you like it a lot when it picks up its hairs from the sink or when it does not deal with your phone and you manage to talk,
2. “You need to calm down”
You may feel bad when someone raises your voice, but if you tell him that he has to calm down he can be equally sympathetic. This phrase does more harm than it does. When you tell someone to calm down, you send the message that what your partner feels is unacceptable. When your partner feels annoyed, remember that what they most need at that moment is confirmation and compassion, so it’s best to say, “I’m sorry you’re irritated, let’s sit down, let’s calm down and let’s see what has happened.
3. “You never hear me”
In fact, you do not need to use the word “never” in general. It’s a way to completely cut off for your partner and leave him/her without hope. It creates a climate that does not help the debate at all. Instead of this, you can say, “When you look at your mobile while I’m talking to you, I feel you do not hear me.”
4. “That’s right, I’ll do it myself”
This phrase indicates that you reject your partner and you do not allow him / her to hear what you need. Do not lay down your partner before you, reducing the help he/she can offer logic. On the contrary, you can say: “I need your help with (describe your problem). It would be valuable. ”
5. “I’m not happy … I want a divorce”
If you want to keep your marriage alive, the threats of divorce will not benefit you. If you do not intend to start the proceedings to divorce, these kinds of threats weaken your relationship. It creates insecurity into your partner. If you are not happy in your wedding, you can say it, but the most important thing is to think about what you can do about it. If you want to fight for your marriage, you need to have a constructive approach that does not include the word “divorce”.
6. “Is there Someone Else?”
You spend less and less time together, you have rarely more personal moments and start wondering if there is someone else in his life. Although you must definitely share your concerns, you must do it carefully. Asking directly whether there is a third person can challenge your partner’s credibility, your trust and respect. In addition, such accusations will cause your partner’s anger to get away.